OT - Live Long & Prosper

[RDV]

Greetings:

This weekend has not been a lot of fun. I normally(for the last 20 years or so anyway) am at a gig on Friday & Saturday & I really don't know what to do with myself if I'm not at work(idle hands are the devil's workshop).

So if I have offended anyone I would like to offer my apologies here and now.

I want to say something here though about the state of relations here on this forum. I'm afraid the flaming and otherwise unfriendly arguments are getting worse, rather than better. I'd hate to see such a nice place go the Ampage way.

That said, as I fear I am adding to the problem rather than helping, I'm going away for a bit. I'm a guitar player, not a tech, & some of my 'advice' has been a bit suspect at the least.

I just wanted to state what I think is a relevant opinion before I fade away.

Ricky Don Vance

[The Tone God]

I'm of similar mind when it comes to the current state of the forum. I hope its just a phase the forum is going through. I hope that it won't cause you to leave perminately as I would consider that a loss to the community. I also don't think you said anything offensive.

If you need to recharge your batteries then take as much as you need. You will be welcomed back with open arms if you come back. Take care.

Andrew

[Ansil]

here here my friend we all have to take  a break i am still on a mini vacation as it is.  in april i will have to be silent for longer than iwoudl like cause i have a few orders taht are massive to fill

good luck GOD SPEED

[Fret Wire]

Ansil, now more than ever, you're needed on those flame threads to post your link to Woman's Day Magazine! lol! A true classic!

Seriously, 2004 is getting pathetic around here. I'm still a newbie, pedal wise, and it's getting harder to learn here, because some of the good threads keep getting derailed into flame threads. I think some people are a little too computer-bound, and need to remember that manners still count. A simple rule is: don't say anything with a typewriter that you wouldn't say to someone's face.

On other forums, you ask a question, and some punk who can't even play a power chord flames you. Then there's five more pages of punks grunting to each other like some kind of cyber-Bevis and Butthead.

How is what's been happening here lately any better or different? I like this forum, alot of talented people to learn from here, pro and ametuer. I'd hate to have to find another.

It seems to happen to most forums. A good analogy is a small neighborhood bar. You get a small group of regulars. Because you don't want to lose their business, you cater to their wants. The bar then becomes an extension of their living room. This drives away new business, things stagnate, then it happens: you lose! (all of us, in this forum's case).

What I meant by regulars in this case, are the people who have a pattern of derailing threads, not the usual people that we hope answer our questions.

[troubledtom]

booooooo and whoooooooooooooo.
      it'll all work out.  we should "try" stick together ,..........$$&^$%$*&
it's aron's forum....deal w/ it.
    ....  choose to post or not .
      ethics and morals are for guilty minds.[i'd rather drink a beer and build my devices ]
          keep it real , be cool,
                   - tom

[BillyJ]

Hell RDV unless I am mistaken we have had waves and I think all in all your a cool dude and think it would be a drag if you split.
I get caught talking more shit than anyone and I still get some love for at least being who I am.
Yeah I catch shit too but what the hell....
Stick around dude!
....at the end of the day we are all jonesed for sweet tone of one kind or another...end of story!!
Let us keep in mnd we are more alike than we are different.

[smoguzbenjamin]

RDV you leaving would also be a loss to me. Hell I still need to buy your CD I think we need to add a small rule: If you have nothing to add, and you are posting out of boredom, then don't post, turn the computer off and do something else.  I freqeuntly catch myself just posting stuff because I am bored. I think I have to install some of those video games again

[aron]

>I'm afraid the flaming and otherwise unfriendly arguments are getting worse, rather than better. I'd hate to see such a nice place go the Ampage way.


They will only continue as long as the parties involved want them to continue.

It's obvious but if you guys start feeling like things are getting out of hand, write me or Peter and we will end the threads.

After that, remember that this is a hobby which have for FUN, not for arguing online (which is pretty pointless anyway).

If people feel they really need to argue, take it to email or PM.

That being said, how many threads are arguments? I don't count many at all. There are way more productive threads than bad ones.

I think I may need to put back the old forum rules as harsh as people thought they were, at least it seemed to work.

[smoguzbenjamin]

Pardon my ignorance, what were the old forum rules? :roll:

[puretube]

I think the worst is over, and everybody has cooled down by now...

RDV: stay, please!

nice sunday t`all...

[Paul Perry (Frostwave)]

I think if there IS any trouble on the board, it is MORE important that the "good guys" stay, to dilute the effect! (actually, on the average, people here are more polite & smarter than peopel in my street, and I'm in a reasonably good neighbourhood).
If I ever appear to have gone, it means either I'm dead, or my computer, or both. Not for a while yet I hope
BTW, there are some thread headings that I see & think... no, life is too short..

[Peter Snowberg]

I'll second everything that Puretube said.

Taking a break once in a while can be a very good thing. I just did this for a couple weeks myself. Please do come back once you've had a breather.

Things are going to be a little different from this point on. Once a thread starts to get out of line, I'm just going to lock it. Hopefully this will be a rare occurrence. I'm still amazed by how trouble free this place is overall.

Take care,
-Peter

[Mike Burgundy]

Take a deep breath, and don't let a couple of nitwits take over.
We all get a little ruffled at times, this is not a reason to start blaming yourself - don't leave!
That way the "old" crew (by that I mean all of us who "belong" here, not some kid who is here for a quick ripoff or to annoy people) would all decide to back off for a while alltogether - and the forum would completely be populated by *the people responsible for the real problem*
See my point?
Even Jack and RG have exchanged "differences of opinion". It's all in the wording, respect and in not jumping to rash conclusions
If we stick together, this little haven will remain.

[Mark Hammer]

To my mind, there is only one issue that remains ripe for heated debates (public posting and IP) and that one is simply never going to go away or be resolved flawlessly because it is absolutely inherent to the net itself.  People ARE going to have serious differences of opinion because there is no single "right" view, but of course they do that in the parliaments and senates of every democracy too, don't they, and you don't see people folding democracy up and packing it away?  I'm not saying we couldn't spruce up the quality of debate sometimes, but I don't expect everyone here or on any forum to be equally skilled in debating and am happy to cut them as much slack as they need if there is any faint hint of debate (as opposed to mere attack or slander) clumsily embedded in their comments.  The very fact that people disagree about some topics should not be seen as a compelling justification for throwing one's hands up and walking away.

I think the quality of debate here is underscored by how easy it is to post something called "dumb newbie question" and get decent civil answers.  I've seen people tell someone they are wrong, wrong, wrong, but I've not seen anyone humiliated for their views over hundreds and hundreds of threads.  More importantly, I've NEVER seen anyone who may have felt they crossed over a line and offered even the remotest hint of apology be rejected for doing so.

Passover is coming up in a few weeks, and one of my favourite parts of the seder service is the story of the 4 sons.  One son is arrogant and snarky, one is disinterested, one is clever and inquisitive, and the 4th does not even know enough to form a question.  The task is how to broach the story of the Exodus.  All deserve answers, and a helpful response.  One needs to tailor the response to the individual,  but turn any one of them away and you've failed the mission.

I have tried to do my bit to maintain civility here and on Ampage, and that has sometimes inflamed people rather than placated them (some of us have fewer steps to our pedastal :oops: ), but I can tell you that the "workload" here is infinitely less than on Ampage.  If people feel a need to back off and recharge their emotional NiCads, or simply lurk for a while, do whatever makes you feel excited again because everybody benefits when you ARE excited and enthusiastic.  Every prodigal son/daughter is redeemable and welcomed back, though.

[petemoore]

I learned this one a long time ago, nad use it alot.
 When someone is hostile, instead of beginning a statement with 'you' or the persons name and TELL them where they moofed...rephrase the response in the form of a question [not a loaded one though].
 This technique is extremely disarming, and allows the 'hostile' not only a choice, but a graceful way out of the hostile approach.
 Just quote the silly part and ask to have it explained...let them vent all they want...its only electrons behind the CRT glass anyway...let ppl have their distorted views/whatever...ask if they've ever thought of it 'this' way...
  With someone cool you can rib them usually and get away with it, but for someone who's dander is up, best to take a deadpan approach, straight, and don't reflect the hostility...that leads to rage in the mirror, reflect back by the other mirror...back and forth to infinity. Try a Different angle.
 I think we all see what's behind the CRT...the vibe the person typeing is feeling...don't worry there are others who see exactly what you see when your'e certainly looking at a hostile post.
 It's almost always something else anyway...I'd be willing to bet that most of the hostile posts are about something happening at the home that the poster can't talk about...
 I've had 'friends' 'stop by' as an escape route from family hostility...just lovely...they stop by and the hair is standing up on the bac of their neck...lol...oh we're really having fun today!!!
 Basically there's something nasty in there and th'eyre just having a tuff time getting it out of there...btahhghhh...every where they go...lol...nobody seems to be able to help them...they can't seem to form the right questions etc...probably no EZ fixes for it anyway...

[Aharon]

If my opinion counts RDV, I'd like you to stay.
Aharon

[RDV]

Thanks for all the kind thoughts all. I took my self off of my anti-depressant(with my doctor's blessing) a week or so ago and the comedown can be rugged. Everything that happens gets magnified, i.e. sounds, emotions, etc. as the dulling effect wears off.

It seemed like my pleasant little haven(this forum) was going to crap(it's not of course). I feel quite a bit better & more rational today. I've read lots of these 'goodbye cruel forum' posts and I never thought I'd write one myself. Go figure!

Higher than normal Regards

RDV

[puretube]

I've read lots of these 'goodbye cruel forum'

sounds like ya have visited H-C FX-forum lately?

Hi there, back again!!!

[Peter Snowberg]

I'm glad things are looking up for you RDV.

I've watched a few people come of anti-depressants and it's obviously a bumpy ride at times. I'm convinced that the majority of those chemicals (SSRIs & SNRIs) are PURE evil, and not in a good way. The things that firghten me most about them are that most cause permanent neurological damage (got a realitive that just about can't feed himself thanks to tardive dyskinesia), and that medical science has no idea how they actually work (and don't work). The adds all say "depression might be" or "could be" or "may be". :cry: It's all a big scam. (multi-multi billion $ at this point)

Take care and remember that you have support here!

-Peter

[RDV]

sounds like ya have visited H-C FX-forum lately?

I tried to sign up there and they never sent me a password!

Regards

RDV